The Beetles in the Cakes

I began to yawn, but it was abruptly stifled as a heavy something--or someone--pounced me and slammed my head into the dishwasher. This heavy someone was a man with an awful complexion and a swirling moustache. A tall poofy hat sat atop his head, pushing his matted hair onto his greasy face. I sat up and marveled at the stranger who had interrupted my yawn. He spoke. "I am the great Dragon of the Sea! I come to make some cakes with you, for cakes are the newest trend in my hometown of Valentine Land." So we set to work making cakes, if only to get this badgering piece of shit out of my kitchen. Sometimes, it is better to do the right thing than to worry about cantering around your own kitchen like an ignorantly self-righteous fiend.